It still doesn't seem real that he is gone. And yet every single day something reminds me of him and I remember he is. My biggest brother gone. Not here for my kids to sing Happy Birthday too, or eat his favorite jello cake. Not here to talk music and movies with. Or even listen to him tell me about his favorite foods and places to eat. Or the big plans he wanted to do.
Aaron I miss you so much I can't even express it. Just typing these words makes it hard to breathe and my eyes are welling up with tears. I am trying to not think about all the "I wish I had's", but focus on the fond memories and good times we shared. I don't know if this will ever get easier. I really doubt it. The kids and I talk about you all the time. They too have fond memories. I will never let them forget.
I know that where you are you are busy doing God's work. That you are free from the miserable things in this life. That you are happy. And that makes me happy.
I know you come around and visit. I can't help but think it's you there every time baby Mason randomly starts giggling while looking at something that I can't see. Or when I play the piano and I feel a warmth next to me on the bench.
I love you Aaron. Forever and Always. And I look forward to celebrating birthdays with you when we are reunited.
Happy Birthday big brother!
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