Fear and Faith

it has been a very scary and long emotional day for me today. i found blood in Braddocks poop, and we were immediately sent to the emergency room. after watching him go through an xray, then stool samples, then a catheter for urine which made him scream so hard. then an iv that they had to dig to get, and again the poor baby screamed through. then it was blood work.  which they could not get through his iv, so it was five pricks in his heel and even that they could not get enough blood from. so we waited. and we ended up being taken by ambulance to primarys  hospital.  i watched as they did a spinal tap on my tiny six week old.  i watched in complete fear.  i am terrified that something major is wrong with my perfect baby boy. 

so here i am, one o clock in the morning. rocking my baby. we are admitted and staying at least through late late tomorrow night. he is on another iv, he has had antibiotics. 

but despite all my fear, i have faith.  and i realized that as my sweet sister and her husband came up. and my brother in law and James gave braddock a blessing.  i was filled with the spirit and calmed.  i have complete faith that he will be ok, and we will be able to figure out what is wrong.  we have been blessed with amazing doctors here, which i have never experienced here.  we actually had the department head as our doctor. and the nurses have all been so sweet.

Braddock is amazing. he is so tough and such a trooper going through all of this.

so i look forward to tomorrow, and hopefully finding out what is causing the blood. 

until then, my faith is strong, my heart is grateful and my fear is mostly calmed :)